By Michelle Porchia I have an annual day called “Innergize Day.” It encourages people to take one day a year for themselves to do something they enjoy or rarely take time to do. The goal is that you will take a day a year, a day a month, and a few hours a week for yourself.
A few years ago, I attended a panel discussion comprised of women at the level of CEO. They talked about the importance of learning to unplug; they were reminded of this when their children started commenting about them conducting business on the phone while on vacation. Lastly, there was an AT&T commercial where the child asked the mother when they could become a meeting. The commercial, of course, was about being able to work from anywhere when you have your phone. The message I took away was the child was asking for more time with the mother. I recently spent 11 days in Italy. It was beautiful. The food and drink were amazing. I love Italy and would live there if I could. What I learned from this trip is that people really do have trouble unplugging. There were 13 of us as a group on this trip. I only used my phone to take pictures, and I didn’t take that many. I took magazines to read and my journal to write and reflect. Several people had their phones and tablets. They were taking pictures nonstop, and at dinner they would be on their phones and tablets uploading pictures to Facebook and sending pictures to family and friends. Some even took calls at the dinner table. I believe they missed experiencing the beauty of the moment. They missed out on truly tasting the savor of the many courses of authentic Italian food. And they missed out on interacting and getting to know others. Now, I’m an introvert but at dinner I had conversation with the people sitting around me. After the first day, I didn’t miss being on Facebook or texting. I enjoyed being in the moment. We stayed at a bed and breakfast on the second leg of our trip. The hotel had a room that had a fireplace in it. When we returned from our day’s excursion, I would sit in the room and just enjoy the fireplace. Sometimes I would read a magazine or journal, but most of the time I was still and just looked at the fire. Europeans take vacation every year and they do not work during their vacation. They enjoy their vacation, family and friends. We, as Americans, can learn from this. I remember on one of my corporate jobs my message said I was on vacation and would not be checking for messages. People left me a message saying a novel idea and then they left me the business message. They actually thought I was still going to check my messages even though I said I was on vacation and would not check for messages. Why? Because in that corporate culture people worked during their vacation. At another panel I attended, a male CEO said he was in Italy and his daughter looked at him when he took a call and said, “Really, Dad? You are going to take a call while we are here in Italy?” She shook her head and walked away. He didn’t take any more calls the rest of the trip. Whether you have family or not, you need to unplug. You need to enjoy vacation, time at home, lunch (without working). If a business cannot run without you for 30 minutes, two days or a week, what does that say about the people you have chosen to be part of your business or what does it say about your leadership style? I encourage you and challenge you to try to unplug. Start small. Take lunch and do not have your phone. See what happens.
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by Michelle Porchia The earth is preparing to rest from all the splendor (and turbulence) it gave us this year. It has been a year of extreme weather and extreme changes. Even more so, I encourage you to slow down and rest, relax, rejuvenate yourself.
"I just don't have time to do the personal things I want or need to do for myself." Have you ever said that? If you have, it is time for you to take an Innergize Day. It is a day set aside for you. It is a time when you can devote some attention to your own personal endeavors—a "do anything you want to do for yourself" day! My goal is to get people to start with one day per year, progress to one day per month, then one day per week, and eventually an hour per day. It is a time of "self-celebration" to be incorporated into one's daily lifestyle. Nowadays everyone is so busy going and doing instead of being. Below are five steps on how you can innergize. It is scheduled for the day after Autumn begins every year (this year September 23) because that is when the earth goes to rest. I want you to rest. Step One: Give Yourself Permission (I've said this before). Give yourself permission to put yourself first and NOT feel guilty. When you take care of yourself, you are better able to take care of others. When you rest, relax, renew, rejuvenate, you have the energy and clarity to do what you want to do. Step Two: Schedule an appointment with YOU. We put everyone else on the calendar. It is time to put YOU on the calendar. Start small; schedule 15-30 minutes a week to do something for yourself. Try to expand it to 15-30 minutes a day. Step Three: Take Your Breaks. There is a tendency to skip lunch and breaks while we work or we eat while we work. It is important to take periodic breaks to rest your body and mind. When you rest your mind, you are more productive and creative. It is also important to eat properly (this does not mean eating at your desk and working through lunch). Step Four: Entrepreneurs: You Are Your Business. Investing in taking care of your mind, body and spirit is investing in the foundation of your business. If you are not able to work, your business will suffer. It is crucial to make health and happiness a priority while developing your business. If you work 24/7, you will burn out. You need to schedule time for you in the same way you do for your clients. You can't give 110%, you don't have it to give. Step Five: Celebrate. There were two very popular songs out this year, "Let It Go" from the movie Frozen and "Happy" from the movie Despicable Me 2. Both songs talk about being yourself and enjoying life. You need to celebrate yourself. Celebrate life. Celebrate the little things as well as the big things. You don't have to celebrate elaborately. You can do simple things like treat yourself to flowers, a new book (and allowing yourself to read it), buying a Pumpkin Spice Latte, going to bed early, watching a movie in bed, etc. ============================== Your Comments Are Welcome!! by Michelle Porchia During the month of August many people will be traveling around the world, across the U.S. or participating in "staycations." Whatever the case may be, keep in mind the power of words. This video demonstrates it powerfully. The Power of Words Whether we're only engaging in self talk or speaking to others, always remember that words paint pictures.
On a lighter note, don't forget that words have different meanings in different regions. For example, "pop" in the Midwest is what "soda" is called in the Northeast. "Coke" down South tends to mean "soda" and you have to specify what type you want. Ask for a frappe in Michigan and you will get a very confused look (ask for a milkshake instead). So keep in mind when you use a word, depending upon where you are, it can have a very different meaning. Words paint pictures. Whether it's on vacation, at home or at work, let's be clear on the words we are using and the pictures we are painting. Happy innergizing! ===================== Your comments are welcome. By Michelle Porchia Often we are told to live in the moment. For the most part I agree with this. We are so busy multi-tasking, thinking about “what next,” etc., that we often miss the joy of what is happening now or miss the journey trying to achieve the goal. There are times when we need to step out of the moment to gain a new or different perspective. Many times we are so caught up in a problem or things not going as we thought that we need to step back and see the situation with different eyes. I remember when I was growing up and I didn’t see something right in front of me, my mother would say, “You can’t see the forest for the trees." I think many times all we see are the trees and we miss the beauty of the forest and all that it brings. Seeing With Different Eyes
Hearing With Different Ears
Sometimes we need to step back or step out of a situation to gain a clearer perspective, understanding or vision. When we do this, it can help us to move forward, adjust or change to gain a new momentum and/or a clearer vision. ------------------------------------------ Your Comments Are Always Welcome. By Debra Gould, MS Ebony Speakers first successful creation was a book project entitled “Real Women, Real Issues: Positive Collaborations for Business Success” is a unique collaboration between four dynamic women coming together from many years of varied experience and from their mastermind group experience. Out of that experience came the concept of communicating with other women on the importance of maintaining quality personal, professional and business relationships with other people who promote positive living. Ebony Speakers is excited to announce that our second project was a recent webinar on Wednesday, June 18, 2014. It was just another example of the next level of connecting our audience to the powerful message of real women working in collaborations. During one of our unique mastermind sessions we all determined that it was time to launch a webinar. We are blessed to have a technology savvy business woman like Carole Copeland Thomas to lead the way to address the program logistics to host this webinar series. Nancy J. Lewis agreed to take on the online registering process and it was onward to create the webinar entitled Savvy Sisters: Share Strategies for Everyday Life. The day of the webinar Carole Copeland Thomas welcomed our guests to sharpen up their skills while moving forward in life. This important webinar will covered these topics. Your Personal SWOT Assessment by Debra W. Gould Taking Charge of Your Career by Nancy J. Lewis Using INNOVATION to Get Things DONE by Michelle Porchia Reinvent Yourself & Stay Relevant in Technology by Carole Copeland Thomas Here are a few highlights of what we shared with our listening audience on June 18. Debra's conversation on how can I use the SWOT Assessment to validate my strengths and opportunity to attack the guilty feelings every time I decide to take time for myself. Nancy's conversation was discussed the difference between whining and winning and addressed the tough questions regarding taking charge of your own career. Michelle's conversation discussed technology, tools, your game plan, and work boundaries. Carole's conversation was on the rapidly changing world, connections, collaborations, and effectively using social media including Facebook, Twitter, YouTube and LInkedIn. We realize seating was limited for this online registration at only $29.00 per person. If you missed out on June 18th due to meetings, business travel or whatever let me suggest a way to get you plugged into this informational, educational, motivational and inspirational webinar. Ebony Speakers still want to invite you to attend our exciting “special one hour” webinar held on June 18, 2014. Here's how it will work: First, register and purchase the webinar. Then...
1. Go to www.ebonyspeakers.com 2. On the top menu bar drop down the Savvy Speakers box found underneath the Webinar Series Box. 3. Our Savvy Sisters Webinar is a Password Protected webpage on our website. 4. You can also download the slides on this page All I can say is WELCOME and get ready to explore your ability to excel, enjoy the webinar and thank you to our guests. Lastly, we are in the process of scheduling future webinars by Ebony Speakers. From years of experience in training, human resources and corporate consulting Debra W. Gould, Nancy J. Lewis, Michelle Porchia and Carole Copeland Thomas have crafted a power-packed business guide for women and men of all ages and ethnicities. We hope you'll join us for future webinar discussions! Topics in the webinar toolkit include: •Global Diversity •Career Transition •Networking •Relationship Economics •Starting and Running A Business •Working Through Difficulties and Challenges ================================== Debra W. Gould, MS is the president of Debra Gould & Associates, Inc. based in New Orleans and provides management consulting and training services to commercial and government clients. Debra is one of the founders of The Ebony Speakers and co-author of the book, Real Women, Real Issues - Positive Collaborations For Business Success. Debra can be reached at: (504) 244-6576, email: djgould@gouldassoc.com and website: www:gouldassoc.com By Michelle Porchia We have four to five generations of women alive right now. In the workplace we have supervisors, mangers and leaders in their 20's responsible for staff that are older and have much more work experience. When I was a corporate trainer, I often advised more senior workers (work wise and age wise) on how to work effectively with their younger supervisors and colleagues.
This is not about generations though. I want women to understand the value of encouraging, teaching and sharing your experiences with younger women. Conversely, more experienced women can learn from the younger women as well. I have had many mentees and our relationship has been mutually beneficial, as I would hope all mentor/mentee relationships would be. I’ve asked them what they wanted me to share with them, I shared what they wanted and more. I also learned tremendously from them. One thing I learned from my INROADS advisees was to lighten up. I have stayed in touch with all my mentees and many of my INROADS advisees. Several of them have brought me in to their organizations and/or companies as a speaker or trainer. They’ve also referred people (not just women) who became my coaching clients. When I moved to North Carolina, many gave me names of people they knew to network with. I conduct workshops for youth. My two oldest granddaughters have given me ideas, information and helped me to understand so much about high school and middle school aged behavior and their thought processes. I have learned so much from my granddaughters and I have a great deal of respect for the two oldest. I have imparted much wisdom, knowledge and experience to them and I have gained so much from them. Again, during my transition to NC, when I was grappling with some things, my oldest daughter reminded me of some of the philosophies I have shared with her over the years. There are more women in higher positions, in different industries and trailblazers than there were when I was growing up. In fact, when I was growing up, the only women I saw were actors and actresses. I was blessed to have good role models about life. My grandmother was even-tempered. My aunt Gerri taught me the importance of the image I projected by the way I dressed and took care of myself. My aunt (by marriage) Joan showed me that you could be assertive and graceful. She was (is) beautiful, worked in corporate America, had a great sense of humor, was (is) a wonderful cook and was able to stand up for herself. I still look to her for advice. My mother, though I struggled with our relationship as many mothers and daughters do, taught me the importance of education, having a strong work ethic and taught me about accepting cultural differences and exposed me to so many cultural aspects of life. My mother was a concert pianist and an opera singer who never realized her dream. She was a civil worker in Detroit and I don’t remember her ever missing a day of work for illness. I have developed wonderful relationships with some of my younger cousins and continue to learn from them. One cousin has pursued many of her dreams with much success. She has been a news anchor, a director of diversity and now is the president and founder of her own company, Lothery and Associates. Another cousin of mine is a cancer warrior and survivor. She was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer in two areas of her body. She has gone through all the treatment, fought the battle and is now cancer clear. She did it all with style and grace and a smile. She now speaks to women who have been newly diagnosed with cancer. The nurses and doctors couldn’t believe how she always came to treatments looking glamorous and with high energy and a positive outlook. We have a responsibility to mentor, sponsor, and guide, encourage and support the women that are following in our footsteps and creating their own paths. We also, even as the older person, can learn from them as well...it’s not too late. We are our sisters’ keeper. ============= Your Comments Are Welcome By Michelle Porchia In March I spoke at a Sisterhood Celebration weekend at a church in Raleigh, NC. I spoke on “Taking Off the Masks in Roles and Relationships.” This article is not a replication of my presentation; it is, however, another train of thought about our roles in relationships. I’m focusing on work relationships in this article, although I feel the points can also relate to personal relationships. Connecting: We meet people under various circumstances. We never know what will come out of our meeting. There is a saying, “People come into your life for a reason, season or a lifetime.” I suggest that we are open to meeting people without expectation of the purpose of the connection. Though I am a speaker, presenter and life coach, I am also a very strong introvert. People are surprised and don’t believe it when I tell them that. The point is, I understand that some of you may be thinking “I’m shy" or “I’m not comfortable meeting people", etc. I suggest that you just allow yourself to be open to whoever may come your way. When I go to events, I set a goal to meet at least three people I don’t know. Communicating: Communication is very important. Think before you speak. “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” (Stephen Covey) Set expectations up front as to how you are going to interact/work together. Listen. Many people don’t listen to understand, they listen to respond (you’ve heard this many times). Become a good listener. Be open to hearing, and clarify what you have heard. Collaborating is being able to work with another and to cooperate. Basically, each person brings his/her knowledge, experience, skills, thoughts, etc., to a situation and, through connecting and communicating, infusing what each person brings for the benefit of the agreed upon goal.
Ebony Speakers came together in part by using this formula. We connected at several NSA conferences. We communicated what we were doing and where we wanted to take our messages/businesses. We collaborated and created the Ebony Speakers. What makes all of this work together for the good is being authentic, open, honest and vulnerable. Collaborating is very prominent these days. Connecting, communicating and collaborating can open many doors, opportunities and possibilities. By Michelle Porchia Women have created businesses and impacted history, the economy, and personal lives throughout history. As a Black woman entrepreneur myself, I am highlighting a few historic, successful and impactful Black female entrepreneur who paved the way for Black women and all women to become entrepreneurs. There are 24.9% Black women entrepreneurs (catalyst.org). Many people have heard of Madam CJ Walker (1867–1919), a millionaire who built a business on hair-care products. I want to share about the women most have not heard of, except of course Suzanne de Passe, whom most people have heard of. Although many details of Mary Ellen Pleasant's (1814–1904) life are obscure, she lived for a time as a free woman in Boston before coming to San Francisco at the height of the Gold Rush in 1849. Taking advantage of the opportunities available in the booming new city, Pleasant started working as a cook for wealthy clients but soon began opening laundries, boardinghouses, and restaurants, using the $45,000 she inherited upon the death of her first husband. Her establishments were patronized by many of San Francisco's newly minted elite, enabling Pleasant to interact with the city's most powerful businessmen and politicians. An ardent abolitionist and racial advocate, Pleasant employed many African-Americans and used her businesses as a way to promote Black employment throughout San Francisco. Elleanor Eldridge (1784–c. 1845) stands out as an impressive success story from the beginning of American history. The youngest of seven daughters born to Hannah Prophet and Robin Eldridge, a slave who won his freedom fighting in the Revolution, Eldridge began working as a laundress at age ten following the death of her mother. Industrious and naturally bright, she quickly became adept at arithmetic, spinning, weaving, cheese making, and all types of housework. Drawing on her skill with numbers, at age nineteen Eldridge took over her deceased father's estate and quickly opened a business with her sister in Warwick, Rhode Island, weaving, nursing, and making soap. Realizing that investment and versatility were the keys to success, she used their profits to purchase a lot and build a house, which she rented out for forty dollars a year. Eldridge eventually settled in Providence, where she opened a profitable business whitewashing, painting, and wallpapering. Her hard work and enterprising nature enabled her to eventually purchase several houses in Providence for rent income. A strong voice for education, Maggie Lena Walker (1867–1934) became the first African American female bank president. Walker was a member of the Independent Order of St. Luke, an organization founded by a former slave dedicated to the uplifting of African Americans. After becoming leader of the Order when it was on the verge of financial ruin, Walker became the first female bank president in the United States by founding the St. Luke Penny Savings Bank in 1903. Succeeding in her twin goals of revitalizing the Order of St. Luke and encouraging economic security for the black community of Richmond, Virginia, Walker grew her business by welcoming small depositors and helping to finance black home ownership. Her success is evidenced by the fact that the bank, now named the Consolidated Bank and Trust Co., remains open today as the oldest continuously black-owned bank in the United States. True to the Order of St Luke's goal of uplifting African Americans, Walker went on to found other businesses and advocate tirelessly for black rights and women's suffrage throughout her life. Suzanne de Passe (1946 - ) has won numerous awards, including Emmys, Peabodys, and Golden Globes. She is so well known for her managerial abilities that Harvard Business School has conducted two studies of her management style. The twentieth century has seen the slow emergence of Black women in positions of corporate authority, a number of them in the entertainment industry. Suzanne de Passe was one of the first African-American women to become a power player in the music, television, and film industries. Beginning her career as a creative assistant at Motown Records in the 1960s, de Passe rose to become a vice president of the company before turning her attention to screenwriting. After achieving acclaim for works such as "Lady Sings the Blues", the successful film biography of Billie Holiday, de Passe eventually founded her own entertainment company, de Passe Entertainment, which primarily produces material for television. Her ability to balance her projects' creative integrity with the bottom line has proven so successful that Harvard Business School has conducted two studies of her managerial style. De Passe's versatility, creative integrity, and sound business sense has enabled her to become one of the most influential women in the entertainment industry today. Courtesy the Austin/Thompson Collection, by permission of De Passe Entertainment. There were many women to choose from, and it was hard to narrow it down to just a few for this article. I chose women from diversified fields and eras to give a snapshot of the impact that Black women have made to the business/entrepreneurial world, not just for Black women but for all female entrepreneurs and business owners. Keep reaching toward your dreams. Women have sacrificed for us to live our dreams, build our businesses and make an impact. ===================== Your Comments Are Welcome By Michelle Porchia Now that the hustle and bustle of holiday shopping, visiting, stressing, over-eating is over --what do you do with yourself? Are you a person who makes New Year’s resolutions or sets goals that are rarely fulfilled? Do you have high hopes for a better 2014? Let’s look at some overall skills that can help you with entering 2014 in a good space. First, INHALE/EXHALE. Secondly, be still. Third, reflect. It is important that you breathe. Inhale peace and exhale stress. We tend to breathe shallow and breathing is life to our body. So take time to breathe fully and completely We are told to “be still.” You’ve heard me say this before. We’ve become human doers and we were created as human beings. We need to learn to simply BE. Yet we feel living is about being in constant motion. Not so. Try this exercise: turn out the lights, light a candle or use a battery-operated candle and just be still. Focus on the flame. Listen to your inner voice. Try this for at least 5 minutes. Reflect. Try journaling your thoughts. How was 2013 for you? What went well and would you have liked to have done differently? Did you spend time with the people who are important to you – including YOU? Did you spend your time when and where you wanted? This is also where you can address the questions above. Don’t beat up on yourself. Simply listen as you reflect and then decide “now what”? My suggestions for 2014: · Set SMART goals. (Specific, Measureable, Attainable, Realistic and Timed). Goals are usually personal, professional, spiritual, etc. Whatever is important to you and usually not all in one area. Write them down. Break the goals down into small pieces and then make them part of your daily action list. Example: Rather than saying, “I want to lose weight”. A more realistic goal is I want to live healthy. I will: work out 3-5 days a week. I will drink at least 6 glasses of water a day, eat 2-3 vegetables a day (corn is not a vegetable), and eat 1-2 fruits a day. I will go to bed at a reasonable time (set the time and your alarm – yes to go to bed). I will spend at least 15 minutes a day being still. Clear out clutter. Mental clutter. Physical clutter. Emotional clutter. Get help. It’s hard to receive if you are full. The season may be up for some relationships, for some of our “stuff”. During these times, people could use that coat, suit, coffee maker that you haven’t used in years. Donate them to the church store or other organizations. Do a swap. Here’s to a happy, healthy, peaceful and prosperous 2014. Your Comments Are Welcome Merry Christmas, Happy Kwanzaa, and Seasons Greetings To You And Your Family
Throughout The Holiday Season! |
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